I don’t often write about my son.

As open as I am about my infertility struggle and subsequent adoption, I still feel protective of others going through what I did.  So, I keep it general and don’t get too detailed about being on the “other side.”

There’s no doubt about it, kids are entertaining.  Sometimes the hilarity that comes out of their mouths is so guffaw-producing, that I seriously consider it a fantastic ab workout.

This time, though, my son said something random and, to me, profound.  Hey, maybe  5-year-olds routinely say things like this, but for my husband, T, and I, it was a head-turning-eyebrow-raising moment.

It was after dinner one night, and we were just chilling together in the living room.  T and I were talking about whatever, and O was playing on the coffee table with legos.  Randomly, O hopped up on T’s lap, which isn’t unusual.  He likes to cuddle and hug and “fight up” Daddy, after all.

But instead of doing anything remotely akin to play, O said,

“You can’t run away from your shadow, because your shadow is you!”

Then he promptly got off T’s lap and started playing legos again, as if he hadn’t originally moved from that spot.

What.  The.  Frig.

We don’t know where he could’ve heard something like that (even though I am a little “woo-woo” and cheesy at times).  We don’t know why he would say that.  And we have no clue what would prompt him in that random moment to say it.

Okay, Maria….so he said it.  What does it mean?  And why is that so profound?

Well…

If you get my newsletter, you already know that I’ve developed a new free e-course on using the power of your mind to banish crazy infertility emotions and improve fertility (If you’re not on my newsletter, whaaaa???  Get thee to the bottom of this post and Sign. Up. NOW.  Lots of extras and freebies to be had, if you’re on that list!).

The free e-course isn’t quite open yet, but if you’re on the newsletter, you’ll get regular updates [UPDATE: this course is no longer free, but will be offered for a nominal fee soon.  Hang tight!]

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Okay, so anyway, at the end of the e-course, I talk about owning the dark side of you and feeding the light side of you.  Because you’re both!  There’s no need to run away from the dark thoughts, dark moments, and messy, snotty, crazy crying spells!  They are part of you.

I do all of my work at the office, so O definitely didn’t hear me talk about this.  AKA: The kid has ESP or something!

But, I think what’s most profound for me personally, is that I happened to be having one of those dark moments when I felt like I wasn’t doing enough, being enough, thinking enough, producing enough, etc.  You know those thoughts, right?  It’s that I-have-to-be-all-things-to-all-people thing.

And it’s crazy-making!

So, the impulse is to shut those thoughts up by doing something, right?  Most people have a go-to.  Personally, I pick up my phone (or drink wine) or watch a TV show (I love wine) or color (mmm…wine) or read a book (cabernet is awesome).

SuperOBut what’s the point of avoidance?  The mean thoughts come back anyway.  So, what if you just sat with your shadow, said “Yo..whassup,” and just accepted it as part of you?  The fight would stop, the thought would eventually stop tormenting you, and you would be on your merry way.

Yes.  The thought does come back, but you become so skilled at acknowledging it and accepting it, that it gets bored and over time leaves you alone completely.

So, thanks for the shadow reminder, little O.  You sure pack a lot of profound in that little bitty body!

 

 

Be well,

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